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Greetings, Program! I'm Evan (he/him). I live in the area.

I'm an Engineering Manager specializing in and , and I believe putting people first is the key to making good software.

I am a enthusiast, I like playing , (and them and about them), I like taking , I enjoy when I can make the time for it.

Yes, I have moved instances again. Hello Portlanders!

Let’s all just remove “I say this with love” from the cultural vocabulary.

It’s one of those “I’m giving myself permission to say something I shouldn’t” phrases, it’s garbage, and it needs to go. If you’re going to say something rude or overstep, just say that first so we can all be on the same page 😂

Me: “Hey Siri, is it going to rain this afternoon?”
Siri: “There’s no rain in the forecast for this afternoon.”
*five seconds later*
Lightning strike, thunder clap, heavy rain pours down

I’ve been blaming my dislike of s’mores on marshmallows for most of my life but it has just occurred to me that the graham cracker is the real problem.

I feel like almost every meeting I’m in, I spend a lot of time stating the obvious and everybody else is like “yeah duh.” Is this effective management? 🥴

I don’t think you understand how many Cheez-It’s I’m capable of eating in a single sitting.

You’re gonna come back and be like “oh sure the whole box, join the club.” NO.

Two boxes. I could, if I really wanted, sit down and house two family size boxes of Cheez-It’s. At least.

I dunno about y’all but I could really use a break from gaining more life experience.

I have so much of it already! It’s very informative and useful!

My brain would like a month or so to hang out in its underwear binging TV and eating garbage 😂

Give me an iOS feature that lets me route multiple audio streams to different output devices please

I have started playing Knotwords to satisfy my daily word puzzle itch and it is absolutely delightful. 🪢 📝

What’s your favorite cliché karaoke song? I’ll go first; mine’s Sweet Caroline (or one of like ten others)

Having any kind of illness while also raising babies should be illegal

Where do I get a Mark S Allentown holographic cube for my desk

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